The Power Of Being Yourself

The Power Of Being Yourself
by Rachel Sat Siri Dougherty on September 26, 2011

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I heard an interview today with Oprah. She said something that resonated with me so strongly, it almost took my breath away. She said, “If I’d known how successful and wealthy I’d get from simply being 100% myself, I would have started it much, much sooner!” Funny and true! It certainly has worked well for her.

She is honest and open, warts and all, and millions of people around the world love her for it. Not cause she’s perfect, or thin, or went to a certain college, or wears a designer brand of clothing, but because she’s real. People can relate to that.

I am noticing this more and more in my own life. I used to think that I had to be perfect or have it all together (what does that mean anyway?) or be positive all the time. But what I’m noticing is that people respond to me, trust me and respect me more when I share my vulnerabilities, doubts, all the things I thought needed to be hidden. I am starting to see what Oprah is talking about.
Authenticity is golden. When someone is totally and completely themselves it is so attractive. I don’t know about you, but I seem to be getting more and more sensitive to this, and if someone tries to be all phoney around me, it makes me very uncomfortable.

We waste so much time in our lives dancing around trying to figure out what everyone else wants from us. That is an exhausting and pointless dance; it always ends in disappointment and insecurity. And, of course, it makes those people your ‘master’- master of your happiness, sense of success and approval. This never works. I am a reformed do-gooder and I notice I have so much more energy now than I used to. I start with feeding my own soul first and foremost, nourishing my spirit before I go attending to anyone else’s. I have to have something before I can give it away.

If I want to give peace, I must cultivate it within myself. If I want to give love, I must cultivate it within me. Sounds obvious right? But so often we forget and look to something or someone outside us to give us these things.

A dear friend of mine and I play a good game for keeping ‘it real.’ We have a mutual admiration for each other. I think she is a divinely conscious, compassionate and loving human being, she thinks the same of me. Our game is called “worst person in the world’. One of us goes first with something we need to tell the truth about, and then the next person goes. We start off with “I’m the worst person in the world because…… It is so very liberating. We always laugh, as we are throwing off at ourselves and our perfectionist sides that are horrified that we (holy beings that we are) would ever have such a thought! Giving our annoyance or worry or judgement a voice where we hear it without judgement, releases its power over us.

Speak it. Let it be free in you.

One of my favorite lines from the Australian poet and artist Michael Leunig is:

“Let it out. Let it all unravel, and it can be a path on which to travel”.

Be brave. Be authentic. Be You. If it worked for Oprah, it can work for you, too!