Finding the Right Path to Happiness
Also known as "The Hamburger Model"
Many people are raised with the belief that if you get good grades in school, get a degree from a good university, and then secure a good job, then you'll be happy.
Sounds pretty familiar, right?
The problem is that, sometimes, this approach to life doesn't make people happy.
Sure, they might have a wonderful family, a good job and a lovely home, but they are still dissatisfied with life and are searching for something else. No matter how hard they work, or how much money they earn, they still feel unfulfilled.
However, when we experience true happiness, our life takes on a joyful luster and vividness. We're fulfilled and productive in what we do, we accomplish our goals, and our lives have meaning and purpose.
So how can we find this type of happiness?
According to Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, leading researcher and author of the book "Happier," we need to learn how to live for today and for tomorrow at the same time. Only when we find the right balance can we achieve our goals, and live the life we've always imagined.
In this article, we'll explore Tal Ben-Shahar's Happiness Model, and explain how you can use the model to bring more happiness to your own life.
The Model Explained
According to Ben-Shahar's model, there are four archetypes that people can exhibit in the way they live. These are:
Nihilism.
Hedonism.
"Rat Racing."
Happiness.
As you can see in Figure 1 (below), the model is divided into four quadrants. The horizontal axis represents current detriments and current benefits, and the vertical axis represents future detriments and future benefits. (As an example, "staying late at work" is an action that creates a current detriment, but – you hope – delivers a future benefit. As such, it falls in the top left quadrant.)
Each quadrant represents one of Ben-Shahar's archetypes, and each of these archetypes reflects a different combination of present happiness and future benefit.
Let's look at each archetype in greater detail.
Nihilism
Nihilism falls in the bottom left hand quadrant of the Happiness Model.
Nihilists are people who have given up hope of finding meaning in life. Nihilists don't enjoy any present happiness, nor do they have any sense of purpose or hope for the future. As a result, they're "resigned to their fate."
Example: Jim has worked his entire life as a supervisor in the same industry. He's unhappy in his job, and at this point in his career, he's given up on the idea that he'll ever receive another raise.
Not only is Jim unhappy with his current state, but he has no belief that things will change anytime soon. As a result, he's unwilling to work hard to change things.
Hedonism
Hedonism falls in the lower right hand quadrant of the model.
Hedonists focus on present happiness only, and give little thought to future consequences. They may think that "working hard" is painful and tedious, and may avoid this.
As a result, hedonists feel unchallenged, and are often unfulfilled.
Example: Maggie has worked as a temp for years. She flits from one organization to the next, thriving on learning a new role and getting to know new colleagues. But once she has gotten comfortable in the new organization, she quickly becomes bored with her tasks and her colleagues. So, she asks for a transfer.
Although Maggie's life is fun and easy, she's unhappy because she never really accomplishes anything. She has no future goals, nor does she have any purpose to her life.
Rat Race
The Rat Race falls in the upper left hand quadrant of the model. In the Rat Race, we detrimentally put off present happiness in the hope of some future benefit.
This archetype is likely the most familiar to many of us. Here, people constantly pursue goals that they think will make them happy. When those goals are achieved, however, a new goal (and the accompanying stress and anxiety) almost immediately takes its place. While Rat Racers may experience brief flashes of satisfaction when they achieve goals, any thought of present happiness is then quickly pushed to the side.
Example: Carl worked extremely hard through high school, taking advanced placement courses so he could get into a top-notch university (which is what his parents always told him he had to do to succeed). When he got to college, he did a degree in business (when he would've preferred to major in theater), and put off trips and nights out with his friends so he could study.
When Carl graduated, he had numerous job offers thanks to his good grades and past internships. Although he knew he should be happy at his success, he wasn't. He took a job with the largest firm, and started his new career. He continued to work hard, but every promotion and raise he received only added more stress and unhappiness to his life.
Happiness
The Happiness archetype falls in the upper right quadrant of the model. This archetype reflects a good balance between present happiness and future benefits.
According to Ben-Shahar, we achieve happiness when we're able to enjoy both the journey and the destination that we're moving towards. We've learned how to set goals that are meaningful, but we don't focus exclusively on achieving them at the expense of everything else. We focus on today's pleasures, as well as our dreams and goals.
Example: Joan just transferred to a new department in her organization, and she's excited about the role she's taking on. She loves the company, and finds her work meaningful and rewarding. This is the kind of organization she can see herself being a part of for the rest of her life.
Although the option is there for her to work 80-hours a week, Joan has politely but firmly told her boss that she's unable to put in these kinds of hours: spending time with her family is extremely important to her, and she's committed to devoting time for this. She works a reasonable number of extra hours ("no successful business was ever built working 9 to 5"), but, by and large, Joan is home every night for dinner. She's achieved a perfect balance in her career: she's there for her family, and engaged in a challenging and rewarding career.
Using the Model
Dr. Ben-Shahar says that it's impossible for us to feel constantly happy all the time. Sometimes, we do have to put off present happiness for important future gains; for instance, when we have to stay late at work to finish an important project.
It's also sometimes important to focus on present pleasures, as a hedonist does. For instance, lying on the beach or watching TV can not only rest and rejuvenate us, but these pleasurable activities can also bring happiness into our life.
The point, however, is to spend as much time as possible engaged in activities that give us both present and future benefits.
What's most useful about the Happiness Model is that it can be used as a window into our life. For instance, look at the four quadrants. Where do you spend the majority of your time?
Are you living a Rat Race life, pursuing future goals at the expense of your present happiness? Or are you living more as a Hedonist, avoiding challenging goals in order to pursue daily pleasures, with no thought to future growth or development?
Or, do you feel that you've achieved happiness? Are you taking pleasure in today, as well as focusing your efforts on pursuing longer-term goals?
We can use the Happiness Model to assess where we are in our current life. If we're not in the right quadrant of the model, we can start today making changes that will create more balance in our life.
Note:
To explain this model, Ben-Shahar uses the analogy of eating different types of hamburger. "Nihilistic hamburgers" taste bad and leave you feeling ill. Hedonistic hamburgers taste great, but make you fat. Rat race hamburgers are boring but are good for you; while happiness burgers are healthy and taste great!
This is why Ben-Shahar calls this model "The Hamburger Model."
Key Points
The Happiness Model was developed by Harvard professor, Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, and published in his book, "Happier."
The Happiness Model defines four happiness archetypes. These are:
Nihilism - Nihilists have lost the joy in life. They derive no present pleasure in their work or life, and expect no future benefits or rewards. They've "given up."
Hedonism - Hedonists live for the moment. They pursue pleasure and an easy life, and give little or no thought to future consequences and plans.
Rat Racing - The Rat Race archetype often sacrifices current pleasures and benefits in anticipation of some future reward.
Happiness - True happiness is achieved when there is a perfect balance between present pleasure and future benefits.
We can use the Happiness Model to shed light on the life we're living now, and the life that we wish we were living. The power to change always lies within us!
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
Laat je Meevoeren Door het Leven
Je kunt je best doen om het leven naar je hand te zetten, en een gevoel van controle te krijgen. Je kunt je ook laten meevoeren door het leven, en kijken waar het schip strand!
Zoeken naar een gevoel van controle
Een gevoel van controle zorgt voor een gevoel van rust. Het is fijn om grip op je leven te hebben, omdat je veel beter weet wat je kunt verwachten.
Het loslaten van deze controle is vaak moeilijk, maar kan soms toch heel waardevol zijn. Want wie de drang naar controle loslaat kan zich rustig laten meevoeren met het leven.
Het leven laat zich bijzonder slecht controleren
Doorgaans heeft het leven de vervelende eigenschap dat het zich bijzonder moeilijk onder controle laat houden. Hoe hard we ook ons best doen.
De eeuwige drang naar meer grip en meer controle is dus uiteindelijk zinloos. Het enige dat je voor elkaar kunt krijgen is een vals gevoel van controle.
Om dit gevoel te bereiken moet je echter wel je best doen. Je bent constant bezig met plannen, overzicht creëren en je todo lijsten bijwerken. Bezigheden die tijd kosten en vaak niet zo leuk zijn.
Laat jezelf meevoeren door het leven
Wanneer je stopt met het streven naar controle over het leven, houd je tijd en energie over voor andere dingen. Maar dan moet je wel het lef hebben om jezelf te laten meevoeren met de stroming van het leven.
Dat betekent dat je dingen niet altijd helemaal tot in de puntjes probeert te controleren, maar dat je het leven voor een deel over je heen laat komen. Je maakt je geen zorgen over ieder detail. Je laat je meestromen met de rivier, en stopt er tegenin te zwemmen.
Je besluit je simpelweg minder druk te maken, je perfectionisme los te laten, en jezelf af en toe in het diepe te gooien. Het kan eng zijn om de controle over je leven op bepaalde gebieden los te laten. Maar besef dan altijd dat dat gevoel van controle dat je opgeeft in de eerste plaats al een illusie was!
Voel hoe makkelijk je leven wordt
Het leven weet je vaak te verrassen wanneer je het vrij laat stromen. Door je zoektocht naar grip te staken kunnen er plotseling mooie dingen op je pad komen die je anders niet waren opgevallen.
Je geeft jezelf geen ruimte voor nieuwe projecten als je jezelf helemaal vastzet in een strakke planning. Wanneer je probeert een feestje helemaal te ‘regisseren’ dan zul je merken dat je teleurgesteld achterblijft. Je dochter kan zich niet vrij ontwikkelen als je altijd alles perfect wilt doen voor haar.
Durf dus de touwtjes eens te laten vieren. Laat de controle los, begeef jezelf eens op onbekend terrein en laat het leven gewoon over je heen komen. Je leven wordt luchtiger, leuker en vooral een stuk eenvoudiger.
Meer tips voor een go-with-the-flow leven!
Stop met vijf dingen tegelijk te doen, je hoeft niet rond te rennen om je leven ‘in stand’ te houden. Kom tot stilstand, bepaal wat je echt belangrijk vindt en ga rustig verder.
Laat de controle los en begin het leven te ervaren!
Zoeken naar een gevoel van controle
Een gevoel van controle zorgt voor een gevoel van rust. Het is fijn om grip op je leven te hebben, omdat je veel beter weet wat je kunt verwachten.
Het loslaten van deze controle is vaak moeilijk, maar kan soms toch heel waardevol zijn. Want wie de drang naar controle loslaat kan zich rustig laten meevoeren met het leven.
Het leven laat zich bijzonder slecht controleren
Doorgaans heeft het leven de vervelende eigenschap dat het zich bijzonder moeilijk onder controle laat houden. Hoe hard we ook ons best doen.
De eeuwige drang naar meer grip en meer controle is dus uiteindelijk zinloos. Het enige dat je voor elkaar kunt krijgen is een vals gevoel van controle.
Om dit gevoel te bereiken moet je echter wel je best doen. Je bent constant bezig met plannen, overzicht creëren en je todo lijsten bijwerken. Bezigheden die tijd kosten en vaak niet zo leuk zijn.
Laat jezelf meevoeren door het leven
Wanneer je stopt met het streven naar controle over het leven, houd je tijd en energie over voor andere dingen. Maar dan moet je wel het lef hebben om jezelf te laten meevoeren met de stroming van het leven.
Dat betekent dat je dingen niet altijd helemaal tot in de puntjes probeert te controleren, maar dat je het leven voor een deel over je heen laat komen. Je maakt je geen zorgen over ieder detail. Je laat je meestromen met de rivier, en stopt er tegenin te zwemmen.
Je besluit je simpelweg minder druk te maken, je perfectionisme los te laten, en jezelf af en toe in het diepe te gooien. Het kan eng zijn om de controle over je leven op bepaalde gebieden los te laten. Maar besef dan altijd dat dat gevoel van controle dat je opgeeft in de eerste plaats al een illusie was!
Voel hoe makkelijk je leven wordt
Het leven weet je vaak te verrassen wanneer je het vrij laat stromen. Door je zoektocht naar grip te staken kunnen er plotseling mooie dingen op je pad komen die je anders niet waren opgevallen.
Je geeft jezelf geen ruimte voor nieuwe projecten als je jezelf helemaal vastzet in een strakke planning. Wanneer je probeert een feestje helemaal te ‘regisseren’ dan zul je merken dat je teleurgesteld achterblijft. Je dochter kan zich niet vrij ontwikkelen als je altijd alles perfect wilt doen voor haar.
Durf dus de touwtjes eens te laten vieren. Laat de controle los, begeef jezelf eens op onbekend terrein en laat het leven gewoon over je heen komen. Je leven wordt luchtiger, leuker en vooral een stuk eenvoudiger.
Meer tips voor een go-with-the-flow leven!
Stop met vijf dingen tegelijk te doen, je hoeft niet rond te rennen om je leven ‘in stand’ te houden. Kom tot stilstand, bepaal wat je echt belangrijk vindt en ga rustig verder.
Laat de controle los en begin het leven te ervaren!
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Dagelijkse Checklist voor Meer Geluk
Geluk kun je versterken met kleine dagelijkse gewoontes. Met deze dagelijkse checklist kun je iedere dag opnieuw bouwen aan je geluksbeleving en wordt je leven iedere dag leuker!
De kracht zit hem in gewoontes
Je kunt je doel bereiken, de liefde van je leven vinden of een miljoen winnen. Toch zullen al deze zaken je slechts tijdelijk echt gelukkiger maken. Het dagelijkse geluk komt vooral voort uit jouw gewoontes en je manier van kijken.
Door jezelf goede gewoontes aan te leren kun je iedere dag gelukkiger zijn. De onderstaande dagelijkse checklist geeft je een aantal kleine dagelijkse taken die je kunt verrichten om te werken aan je geluk!
1. Tel je zegeningen
Dankbare mensen zijn de meest gelukkige mensen. Onderzoek wijst keer op keer uit dat het voelen en uiten van dankbaarheid één van de meest effectieve manieren is om direct gelukkiger te worden.
Maak een lijstje van minimaal 3 zaken waar je dankbaar voor bent. Dit kan van alles zijn, maar probeer iedere dag te variëren. Door op zoek te gaan naar de gevoelens van dankbaarheid voel je je stemming direct omslaan.
Deze dagelijkse oefening helpt je het leven te relativeren. Je merkt uiteindelijk waar de prioriteiten echt liggen omdat je bezig bent met de zaken die er voor jou echt toe doen. Deze kleine oefening kan een enorme impact hebben op je leven!
2. Ontspan bewust
Neem iedere dag even de tijd om wat rust te vinden. Doe dit niet voor de televisie, maar zorg dat je even zo weinig mogelijk prikkels binnen krijgt. Ga zitten op een rustige plaats en adem even diep in en uit. Laat de spanning wegvloeien.
Je hoeft niet lang te blijven zitten om effect te voelen. Je kunt binnen een paar minuten klaar zijn en merken dat je je meer ontspannen en rustiger voelt. Dit is een geweldige oefening wanneer je je gestresst voelt. Je kunt met dit soort eenvoudige oefeningen stress ook heel goed voorkomen als je er dagelijks wat tijd voor uittrekt.
3. Uit je liefde aan iemand
Wij geloven dat het leven uiteindelijk draait om liefde. Liefde maakt gelukkig. Het hoeft hier niet te gaan om romantische liefde, maar iedere vorm van aandacht die recht vanuit je hart komt.
Je kunt liefde stoppen in je werk, in je hobby, in de natuur. Maar het belangrijkste is dat je liefde geeft aan de mensen om je heen. Geef aandacht, geef warmte en help de mensen om je heen hun leven leuker te maken.
Liefde uiten kan op veel manieren. Je kunt je partner een knuffel geven, of het uiten door te luisteren naar het verhaal van een vriendin met problemen. Het maakt niet echt uit hoe je het doet, zolang het maar recht uit je hart komt en je niets terug verwacht. Door iedere dag liefde te delen met de mensen om je heen maak je jezelf én je omgeving gelukkiger! Lees ook de volgende artikelen:
•Het Pebble Effect van Goede Daden
•5 Manieren om Meer Liefde te Verspreiden
•Leven met de Wet van Geven en Ontvangen
4. Kom een stapje dichter bij één van je lange termijn doelen
Het bereiken van je doelen is belangrijk voor je zelfvertrouwen, en je zelfvertrouwen is een belangrijke bouwsteen voor geluk. Zorg er dus voor dat je iedere dag een stapje dichter komt bij minimaal één doel dat belangrijk voor je is op de lange termijn.
Lange termijn doelen zijn vaak de doelen die het meeste verschil maken. Het zijn de dromen die je nastreeft in je leven. Omdat deze doelen vaak zo verweg liggen is het te makkelijk om ze te blijven uitstellen.
Wil je een slank lichaam? Wil je meer geld verdienen, meer rust vinden of verhuizen? Beweeg er dan naartoe. Iedere stap in de goede richting is een stapje dichter bij je droom. Je hoeft geen grote stappen te maken, zorg dat je iedere dag een beetje beweegt. Zo blijf je bezig met je dromen en worden ze werkelijkheid voor je het weet! Lees ook:
Bereik je Doelen Stapje voor Stapje
5. Schrijf in een dagboek/weblog
Je dag evalueren in een dagboek of een weblog is een enorm goede manier om je gedachten op een rijtje te zetten. Je wordt even geconfronteerd met alles wat je hebt meegemaakt, en je geeft jezelf de gelegenheid om alles een plekje te geven.
Schrijven heeft een therapeutische werking. Wanneer je schrijft dwing je je hersenen om je gedachten te structureren waardoor je plotseling tot allerlei inzichten kunt komen. Bovendien kan het heerlijk zijn om al je problemen dagelijks van je af te schrijven. Zo blijf je geestelijk licht en gelukkig!
Geluk kun je versterken met kleine dagelijkse gewoontes. Met deze dagelijkse checklist kun je iedere dag opnieuw bouwen aan je geluksbeleving en wordt je leven iedere dag leuker!
De kracht zit hem in gewoontes
Je kunt je doel bereiken, de liefde van je leven vinden of een miljoen winnen. Toch zullen al deze zaken je slechts tijdelijk echt gelukkiger maken. Het dagelijkse geluk komt vooral voort uit jouw gewoontes en je manier van kijken.
Door jezelf goede gewoontes aan te leren kun je iedere dag gelukkiger zijn. De onderstaande dagelijkse checklist geeft je een aantal kleine dagelijkse taken die je kunt verrichten om te werken aan je geluk!
1. Tel je zegeningen
Dankbare mensen zijn de meest gelukkige mensen. Onderzoek wijst keer op keer uit dat het voelen en uiten van dankbaarheid één van de meest effectieve manieren is om direct gelukkiger te worden.
Maak een lijstje van minimaal 3 zaken waar je dankbaar voor bent. Dit kan van alles zijn, maar probeer iedere dag te variëren. Door op zoek te gaan naar de gevoelens van dankbaarheid voel je je stemming direct omslaan.
Deze dagelijkse oefening helpt je het leven te relativeren. Je merkt uiteindelijk waar de prioriteiten echt liggen omdat je bezig bent met de zaken die er voor jou echt toe doen. Deze kleine oefening kan een enorme impact hebben op je leven!
2. Ontspan bewust
Neem iedere dag even de tijd om wat rust te vinden. Doe dit niet voor de televisie, maar zorg dat je even zo weinig mogelijk prikkels binnen krijgt. Ga zitten op een rustige plaats en adem even diep in en uit. Laat de spanning wegvloeien.
Je hoeft niet lang te blijven zitten om effect te voelen. Je kunt binnen een paar minuten klaar zijn en merken dat je je meer ontspannen en rustiger voelt. Dit is een geweldige oefening wanneer je je gestresst voelt. Je kunt met dit soort eenvoudige oefeningen stress ook heel goed voorkomen als je er dagelijks wat tijd voor uittrekt.
3. Uit je liefde aan iemand
Wij geloven dat het leven uiteindelijk draait om liefde. Liefde maakt gelukkig. Het hoeft hier niet te gaan om romantische liefde, maar iedere vorm van aandacht die recht vanuit je hart komt.
Je kunt liefde stoppen in je werk, in je hobby, in de natuur. Maar het belangrijkste is dat je liefde geeft aan de mensen om je heen. Geef aandacht, geef warmte en help de mensen om je heen hun leven leuker te maken.
Liefde uiten kan op veel manieren. Je kunt je partner een knuffel geven, of het uiten door te luisteren naar het verhaal van een vriendin met problemen. Het maakt niet echt uit hoe je het doet, zolang het maar recht uit je hart komt en je niets terug verwacht. Door iedere dag liefde te delen met de mensen om je heen maak je jezelf én je omgeving gelukkiger! Lees ook de volgende artikelen:
•Het Pebble Effect van Goede Daden
•5 Manieren om Meer Liefde te Verspreiden
•Leven met de Wet van Geven en Ontvangen
4. Kom een stapje dichter bij één van je lange termijn doelen
Het bereiken van je doelen is belangrijk voor je zelfvertrouwen, en je zelfvertrouwen is een belangrijke bouwsteen voor geluk. Zorg er dus voor dat je iedere dag een stapje dichter komt bij minimaal één doel dat belangrijk voor je is op de lange termijn.
Lange termijn doelen zijn vaak de doelen die het meeste verschil maken. Het zijn de dromen die je nastreeft in je leven. Omdat deze doelen vaak zo verweg liggen is het te makkelijk om ze te blijven uitstellen.
Wil je een slank lichaam? Wil je meer geld verdienen, meer rust vinden of verhuizen? Beweeg er dan naartoe. Iedere stap in de goede richting is een stapje dichter bij je droom. Je hoeft geen grote stappen te maken, zorg dat je iedere dag een beetje beweegt. Zo blijf je bezig met je dromen en worden ze werkelijkheid voor je het weet! Lees ook:
Bereik je Doelen Stapje voor Stapje
5. Schrijf in een dagboek/weblog
Je dag evalueren in een dagboek of een weblog is een enorm goede manier om je gedachten op een rijtje te zetten. Je wordt even geconfronteerd met alles wat je hebt meegemaakt, en je geeft jezelf de gelegenheid om alles een plekje te geven.
Schrijven heeft een therapeutische werking. Wanneer je schrijft dwing je je hersenen om je gedachten te structureren waardoor je plotseling tot allerlei inzichten kunt komen. Bovendien kan het heerlijk zijn om al je problemen dagelijks van je af te schrijven. Zo blijf je geestelijk licht en gelukkig!
Why meditate?
"Meditation is not a way of making your mind quiet. It's a way of
entering into the quiet that's already there--buried under the
50,000 thoughts the average person thinks every day" - Deepak Chopra
I think I should do meditation and have found a site offering a free medidation course that is free.When I first checked out the website I wasn't sure but it is actually very good. I have just finished CD 1 and 2 and I am actually impressed.
http://www.project-meditation.org/
entering into the quiet that's already there--buried under the
50,000 thoughts the average person thinks every day" - Deepak Chopra
I think I should do meditation and have found a site offering a free medidation course that is free.When I first checked out the website I wasn't sure but it is actually very good. I have just finished CD 1 and 2 and I am actually impressed.
http://www.project-meditation.org/
Inspirational song from M people
Below the lyrics of a song I just rediscovered. It very much represents to me the journey I have embarked on
Search for the heroe - M people
Sometimes the river flows but nothing breathes.
A train arrives but never leaves.
It’s a shame.
Oh life - like love that walks out of the door,
Of being rich or being poor.
Such a shame.
But it’s then, then that faith arrives
To make you feel at least alive.
And that’s why you should keep on aiming high,
Just seek yourself and you will shine.
You’ve go to search for the hero inside yourself,
Search for the secrets you hide.
Search for the hero inside yourself
Until you find the key to your life.
In this life, long and hard though it may seem,
Live it as you’d live a dream.
Aim so high.
Just keep the flame of truth burning bright.
The missing treasure you must find
Because you and only you alone
Can build a bridge across the stream.
Weave your spell in life’s rich tapestry -
Your passport to a feel supreme.
Search inside yourself. (you’ve got to search) [x2]
You’ve got to.
(search inside yourself)
Search for the heroe - M people
Sometimes the river flows but nothing breathes.
A train arrives but never leaves.
It’s a shame.
Oh life - like love that walks out of the door,
Of being rich or being poor.
Such a shame.
But it’s then, then that faith arrives
To make you feel at least alive.
And that’s why you should keep on aiming high,
Just seek yourself and you will shine.
You’ve go to search for the hero inside yourself,
Search for the secrets you hide.
Search for the hero inside yourself
Until you find the key to your life.
In this life, long and hard though it may seem,
Live it as you’d live a dream.
Aim so high.
Just keep the flame of truth burning bright.
The missing treasure you must find
Because you and only you alone
Can build a bridge across the stream.
Weave your spell in life’s rich tapestry -
Your passport to a feel supreme.
Search inside yourself. (you’ve got to search) [x2]
You’ve got to.
(search inside yourself)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Trying out Lifeflow
I cam accross the Lifeflow website claims the following:
The life changing benefits of the 8 minute amazing LifeFlow™ audio technology :-
> Within 8 minutes you will quiver with pleasure as endless happy endorphins and anti-ageing hormones flow through your mind and body.
> You will experience a wonderful sense of relief as you release backlogs of stress.
> Experience amazing feelings of inner bliss, extraordinary physical sensations and joy.
> You will activate the power of your natural healing force.
> Melt away anger, fear, depression, anxiety, addictions, and a whole host of dysfunctional feelings and suppressed emotions.
> You will feel increased energy levels within hours of listening.
> Increased brain function.
How it works:
LifeFlow™ has been specifically designed using extremely precise frequencies that resonate and impact the body at a cellular level. You can truly feel your deep relaxation or meditation on a physical level, in surges of positive energy and a flow of deep heartfelt emotions.
Our choice of frequencies are based on extensive biofeedback research.
LifeFlow™ incorporates Isochronic, Monaural and Binaural tones in a structure of 12 simultaneous layers in its entrainment matrix, creating the most effective method of entrainment and whole brain synchronization.
Now I know that if something spoundsto good to be tru it probably is and this seems to be a good example of exactly that. Still I was curious so I downloaded the free sample, nothing to loose right. I have just done a 14 minute sample using the free download. During the session I was thinking the whole time about teh issues we have with the contractor for the extension of the terrace so I did not feel very relaxed in the end I am afraid....
Let's see what happens today...
The life changing benefits of the 8 minute amazing LifeFlow™ audio technology :-
> Within 8 minutes you will quiver with pleasure as endless happy endorphins and anti-ageing hormones flow through your mind and body.
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How it works:
LifeFlow™ has been specifically designed using extremely precise frequencies that resonate and impact the body at a cellular level. You can truly feel your deep relaxation or meditation on a physical level, in surges of positive energy and a flow of deep heartfelt emotions.
Our choice of frequencies are based on extensive biofeedback research.
LifeFlow™ incorporates Isochronic, Monaural and Binaural tones in a structure of 12 simultaneous layers in its entrainment matrix, creating the most effective method of entrainment and whole brain synchronization.
Now I know that if something spoundsto good to be tru it probably is and this seems to be a good example of exactly that. Still I was curious so I downloaded the free sample, nothing to loose right. I have just done a 14 minute sample using the free download. During the session I was thinking the whole time about teh issues we have with the contractor for the extension of the terrace so I did not feel very relaxed in the end I am afraid....
Let's see what happens today...
Saturday, May 14, 2011
The Body Scan Experience
The body scan experience was very different during different times. The first day it was really nice and I was able to to concentrate and focus and be calm. The next day I felt a lot of discomfort in my lower back which really distracted em from focusing on other parts of teh bidy. the third day was really hard, I had so mnay thought running to my mind and it was actually stressfull to be lying down. I had a lot of twitches in my bidy and could not stay still. I felt very irritated and even had to scream a few times. It was an extremely uncomfortable experience.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Day 1 be Mindful Online
The first step in this course is a stress test and my score was 27.
My motivation for starting this course is:
Because I often feel overwhelmed and stresses, espcially by work but also by all the other demands placed on me by family and partner. I feel I have too much to do and I am not doing anything well and do not have my priorities right. As a result I wake up in the middle of the night in a sweat and start to work or do admin stuff. To resolve my issues my initial reaction has been to look for the perfect time management tool or system to allow me to do everything and be in control. I now realize this is not the answer. The lits of to do's will be neverending and no tiem management tool in the world will help me feel in control and calm. The solution is in the way I deal with the demands placed on me but I am not sure how to achieve this. I hope this course will help me with that.
What I expect from this course:
To feel more calm and tranquil and less stressed, to feel more in control of my life, to be able to trust all will work out in the end and not worry all the time. If I achieve that I hope I will be able to be happier and enjoy life more.
I really do want to make a lasting change so I can lead a happier, healthier and more fullfilled life. This is in the end way more important than short term work priorities.
My motivation for starting this course is:
Because I often feel overwhelmed and stresses, espcially by work but also by all the other demands placed on me by family and partner. I feel I have too much to do and I am not doing anything well and do not have my priorities right. As a result I wake up in the middle of the night in a sweat and start to work or do admin stuff. To resolve my issues my initial reaction has been to look for the perfect time management tool or system to allow me to do everything and be in control. I now realize this is not the answer. The lits of to do's will be neverending and no tiem management tool in the world will help me feel in control and calm. The solution is in the way I deal with the demands placed on me but I am not sure how to achieve this. I hope this course will help me with that.
What I expect from this course:
To feel more calm and tranquil and less stressed, to feel more in control of my life, to be able to trust all will work out in the end and not worry all the time. If I achieve that I hope I will be able to be happier and enjoy life more.
I really do want to make a lasting change so I can lead a happier, healthier and more fullfilled life. This is in the end way more important than short term work priorities.
Be mindful......
While I am considering on what is the best way for me to continue working with Michel on the process of intentional transformation I came accross a course from the British Health Foundation: Being Mindful Online
Mindfulness is a mind-body approach to life that helps people to relate differently to experiences.
It involves paying attention to thoughts, feelings and body sensations in a way that can increase our awareness, manage difficult experiences, and make wise choices.
The BenefitsMillions of people have seen the life changing benefits that mindfulness can bring. Not only has it been clinically proven to reduce stress, blood pressure, depression and anxiety, but it has also been proven to help people sleep better, work more effectively and improve their personal and professional relationships. It even helps people cope with chronic pain – pretty amazing stuff!
If you talk to anyone who practises mindfulness, they will tell you that mindfulness helps them to live in the moment and stops them getting caught up in thoughts, so they are free from worry about the next job to do, place to be or phone call to make. Mindfulness enables us to be aware of what we are thinking, how we are reacting and the impact on our emotions, and respond better to different situations
The above seemed approriate for me and I decided to subscribe to the course.
www.bemindfulonline.com
Mindfulness is a mind-body approach to life that helps people to relate differently to experiences.
It involves paying attention to thoughts, feelings and body sensations in a way that can increase our awareness, manage difficult experiences, and make wise choices.
The BenefitsMillions of people have seen the life changing benefits that mindfulness can bring. Not only has it been clinically proven to reduce stress, blood pressure, depression and anxiety, but it has also been proven to help people sleep better, work more effectively and improve their personal and professional relationships. It even helps people cope with chronic pain – pretty amazing stuff!
If you talk to anyone who practises mindfulness, they will tell you that mindfulness helps them to live in the moment and stops them getting caught up in thoughts, so they are free from worry about the next job to do, place to be or phone call to make. Mindfulness enables us to be aware of what we are thinking, how we are reacting and the impact on our emotions, and respond better to different situations
The above seemed approriate for me and I decided to subscribe to the course.
www.bemindfulonline.com
Sunday, May 8, 2011
The Story of Visibility
Now that I am facing my Con Artist rather than allowing it to run my life, I recognize that I am creating a new story about myself that respects the whole of me.
I honor my Spirit intelligence for inspiring and moving me with the energies of…
Trusting all will be all right in the end, believing that if I stay true to myself the pieces of the puzzle will fall into place. Meanwhile it is OK to just be.
I honor my Heart intelligence for grounding and connecting me to the feelings of…
Being connected to other people, feeling empathy, loving and accepting myself for who I am.
I honor my Mind intelligence for clarifying and directing me to see that I am capable of…
Staying balanced, using my talents for the things that are really important to me, not focus on the details but instead let creativity flow, listen to others and be open to new ideas,
My life will not get better if I am doing a perfect job and finalize my to do list. I now believe it is the other way around. If I nourish and connect with my whole self including heart, spirit and body everything else will start to flow and I will have happiness in my life.
I honor my Body intelligence for allowing the visibility of my authentic self to be recognized in the forms of…
Feeling welcome in my body, enjoying how my body feels and how it moves, taking care of my body , take time to enjoy the positive affect of exercise on my body and experience how and enjoy how it gets stronger. Enjoy having restful nights of sleep and a healthy and wholesome meal.
My intention this week is to…
Go with the flow, make the most of every single opportunity to talk, converse and most of all laugh and share beautiful moments with others. Consciously let ideas about my direction for the future guided by my heart and spirit surface.
I honor my Spirit intelligence for inspiring and moving me with the energies of…
Trusting all will be all right in the end, believing that if I stay true to myself the pieces of the puzzle will fall into place. Meanwhile it is OK to just be.
I honor my Heart intelligence for grounding and connecting me to the feelings of…
Being connected to other people, feeling empathy, loving and accepting myself for who I am.
I honor my Mind intelligence for clarifying and directing me to see that I am capable of…
Staying balanced, using my talents for the things that are really important to me, not focus on the details but instead let creativity flow, listen to others and be open to new ideas,
My life will not get better if I am doing a perfect job and finalize my to do list. I now believe it is the other way around. If I nourish and connect with my whole self including heart, spirit and body everything else will start to flow and I will have happiness in my life.
I honor my Body intelligence for allowing the visibility of my authentic self to be recognized in the forms of…
Feeling welcome in my body, enjoying how my body feels and how it moves, taking care of my body , take time to enjoy the positive affect of exercise on my body and experience how and enjoy how it gets stronger. Enjoy having restful nights of sleep and a healthy and wholesome meal.
My intention this week is to…
Go with the flow, make the most of every single opportunity to talk, converse and most of all laugh and share beautiful moments with others. Consciously let ideas about my direction for the future guided by my heart and spirit surface.
The Story of Impact
Through my willingness, courage, and curiosity to face my Con Artist, I see that the impact I offer myself and the world is a story that reflects…
I have let go of my reactivity and desire to control outcomes by being more committed to an energy desire of inner peace and happiness.
This energy grew my self- trust by taking a stand for allowing myself to be vulnerable and less responsible.
I realized that when I don’t betray own energy and feelings, my faith grows because I allow for more…
Interaction with others, more openness, more communication, my softness comes out. I don’t feel I constantly have to prove myself. My interactions with other become more meaningful; I feel more positive and have more faith in the future.
In learning to face the “whole truth,” I saw that I am capable of more than I realized because I released the old story of…
Having to be perfect and being in control and on top of everything. People will only respect and appreciate me when I am perfect. I am not allowed to fail. I always have to be responsible and I am not allowed time to play and to enjoy myself.
Each time I face a challenging circumstance or get stuck in reactivity with my Con Artist, I offer myself this path to remembering that I’m a Life Artist who recognizes who I truly am and all that I have to offer.
I have the willingness to live in the energy of…
being happy and peaceful.
This energy brings me a sense of well-being so I have to courage to stand for it by…
Accepting myself as I am with the good and the bad, my weaknesses and my strengths, Opening up to other people, letting them into my life, be open and really listen to what they have to say without feeling criticized or attacked. Taking time off for work, not to do chores but just to be, taking rest as I need it, Be in the moment, allow myself to enjoy the moment.
As I take this stand for myself, I am more curious about…
What the future will bring. I realize that everything is possible. Life is evolving and this is exciting.
I will look for the whole truth by recognizing…
I am changing, life is changing. I realize I have ignored my heart, body and spirit for a long time and I am committed to becoming a whole and complete person.
I will let go of the following forms that keep me attached to my reactivity…
The idea that I have to be perfect in everything (work, mother, house). Be open to ideas of others, listen more and talk less. Don’t interpret reactions from other as reflecting on me, they are not necessarily attacking or criticizing me, it might well be their con artist at work which makes them behave a certain way.
My intention for this circumstance is…
To consciously engage in interacting with other people, most of all the people I love and care about but also total strangers. I realized open and honest contact with others is what feeds my heart and spirit and creates happiness for me. I have to trust that when I am in balance work and other aspects of my life will flow more and will feel less of an effort.
I have let go of my reactivity and desire to control outcomes by being more committed to an energy desire of inner peace and happiness.
This energy grew my self- trust by taking a stand for allowing myself to be vulnerable and less responsible.
I realized that when I don’t betray own energy and feelings, my faith grows because I allow for more…
Interaction with others, more openness, more communication, my softness comes out. I don’t feel I constantly have to prove myself. My interactions with other become more meaningful; I feel more positive and have more faith in the future.
In learning to face the “whole truth,” I saw that I am capable of more than I realized because I released the old story of…
Having to be perfect and being in control and on top of everything. People will only respect and appreciate me when I am perfect. I am not allowed to fail. I always have to be responsible and I am not allowed time to play and to enjoy myself.
Each time I face a challenging circumstance or get stuck in reactivity with my Con Artist, I offer myself this path to remembering that I’m a Life Artist who recognizes who I truly am and all that I have to offer.
I have the willingness to live in the energy of…
being happy and peaceful.
This energy brings me a sense of well-being so I have to courage to stand for it by…
Accepting myself as I am with the good and the bad, my weaknesses and my strengths, Opening up to other people, letting them into my life, be open and really listen to what they have to say without feeling criticized or attacked. Taking time off for work, not to do chores but just to be, taking rest as I need it, Be in the moment, allow myself to enjoy the moment.
As I take this stand for myself, I am more curious about…
What the future will bring. I realize that everything is possible. Life is evolving and this is exciting.
I will look for the whole truth by recognizing…
I am changing, life is changing. I realize I have ignored my heart, body and spirit for a long time and I am committed to becoming a whole and complete person.
I will let go of the following forms that keep me attached to my reactivity…
The idea that I have to be perfect in everything (work, mother, house). Be open to ideas of others, listen more and talk less. Don’t interpret reactions from other as reflecting on me, they are not necessarily attacking or criticizing me, it might well be their con artist at work which makes them behave a certain way.
My intention for this circumstance is…
To consciously engage in interacting with other people, most of all the people I love and care about but also total strangers. I realized open and honest contact with others is what feeds my heart and spirit and creates happiness for me. I have to trust that when I am in balance work and other aspects of my life will flow more and will feel less of an effort.
The Story of Truth
You are going to look a challenging circumstance that triggered your reactivity this week from the lens of your Whole IQ.
What is happening in this circumstance?
My boss talking to my team without me being present andgiving them instructions to do something without consulting my opinion.
Who or what is threatening to you in this experience?
My boss
What were you yearning or fighting for?
My bosses recognition and respect, I wanted my boss to acknowledge me and ask for my opinion.
What thought formed about yourself in this circumstance?
My boss doesn’t trust me and I don’t know what I’m doing.I am not competent
You are now going to look at the whole truth about this circumstance.
What energy did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
I did not acknowledge that the reasons behind my bosses behaviour mght have nothing to do with me. I probably took this much more personal than it actually was.
What feelings did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
My lack of confidence.
What thoughts did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
I didn’t look to understand where my boss might be coming from.
What forms did you or others misuse in this circumstance?
Respect of space, lack of courtesy
Michele note: Perhaps some misunderstanding around the
use of power.
What is the whole truth that you see at this time about this circumstance?
Awareness that the other has Con Artist and that this doesn’t need to be about me. Boss could be acting from a need to prove something.
Our Con Artist uses our area of reactivity to prove that something is real which inevitably gets in the way of our ability to see the whole truth with greater clarity. What outcome have you been attached to and must let go of in order to see the whole truth with greater clarity?
Letting go of the attachment to being right and realizing that I can see others suggestions as valuable and be open to grow.
How will this grow your self-trust?
Through allowing me to learn, grow from others and not be threatened, and be more inclusive.
What do you need to remember to stay in greater faith?
I don’t know it all and don’t have to know it all.
Curiosity is a good thing and takes the Mind out of reactivity.
My intention for this week is…to be open to others suggestions and seek to learn from their suggestions.
What is happening in this circumstance?
My boss talking to my team without me being present andgiving them instructions to do something without consulting my opinion.
Who or what is threatening to you in this experience?
My boss
What were you yearning or fighting for?
My bosses recognition and respect, I wanted my boss to acknowledge me and ask for my opinion.
What thought formed about yourself in this circumstance?
My boss doesn’t trust me and I don’t know what I’m doing.I am not competent
You are now going to look at the whole truth about this circumstance.
What energy did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
I did not acknowledge that the reasons behind my bosses behaviour mght have nothing to do with me. I probably took this much more personal than it actually was.
What feelings did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
My lack of confidence.
What thoughts did you and others not acknowledge in this circumstance?
I didn’t look to understand where my boss might be coming from.
What forms did you or others misuse in this circumstance?
Respect of space, lack of courtesy
Michele note: Perhaps some misunderstanding around the
use of power.
What is the whole truth that you see at this time about this circumstance?
Awareness that the other has Con Artist and that this doesn’t need to be about me. Boss could be acting from a need to prove something.
Our Con Artist uses our area of reactivity to prove that something is real which inevitably gets in the way of our ability to see the whole truth with greater clarity. What outcome have you been attached to and must let go of in order to see the whole truth with greater clarity?
Letting go of the attachment to being right and realizing that I can see others suggestions as valuable and be open to grow.
How will this grow your self-trust?
Through allowing me to learn, grow from others and not be threatened, and be more inclusive.
What do you need to remember to stay in greater faith?
I don’t know it all and don’t have to know it all.
Curiosity is a good thing and takes the Mind out of reactivity.
My intention for this week is…to be open to others suggestions and seek to learn from their suggestions.
The Story of Gifts
Through living in my intention this week of to be open to others suggestions and seek to learn from their suggestionsI am more aware of my unique gifts of…
Relating to be people, stimulating and motivating people, making people feel good about themselves, being good company
My Con Artist downplays or hijacks these gifts by telling me that…
I have a million things to do that need to be finished now and I can only enjoy myself and engage in social activities when everything is done (looking at it now I think my behavior is almost obsessive)
This old Con Artist story diminished my ability to direct my gifts in the following ways…
Relate to other people, enjoy my work, enjoying quality time with my friends and family
I found myself most alive and curious when I expressed my gift of…
Being able to relate to other people, showing an interest in their thoughts and opinions and wanting to get to know them better. I discovered that I am actually a very social person and memories came back on how I used to have a very nice social life with very meaningful friendships. I realized how this got lots when my perfectionism both in my work and around organizing my home and family took over. This has taken the fun out of my life and also made me not much fun to be around. It resulting in me withdrawing from life.
I learned this week that the clarity and direction of my well-being comes from…
Taking time to play with my children, engaging in social interaction, having conversations with my friends and neighbours.
I even found that people started to talk to me more often and somehow I felt they enjoyed my company more.
Relating to be people, stimulating and motivating people, making people feel good about themselves, being good company
My Con Artist downplays or hijacks these gifts by telling me that…
I have a million things to do that need to be finished now and I can only enjoy myself and engage in social activities when everything is done (looking at it now I think my behavior is almost obsessive)
This old Con Artist story diminished my ability to direct my gifts in the following ways…
Relate to other people, enjoy my work, enjoying quality time with my friends and family
I found myself most alive and curious when I expressed my gift of…
Being able to relate to other people, showing an interest in their thoughts and opinions and wanting to get to know them better. I discovered that I am actually a very social person and memories came back on how I used to have a very nice social life with very meaningful friendships. I realized how this got lots when my perfectionism both in my work and around organizing my home and family took over. This has taken the fun out of my life and also made me not much fun to be around. It resulting in me withdrawing from life.
I learned this week that the clarity and direction of my well-being comes from…
Taking time to play with my children, engaging in social interaction, having conversations with my friends and neighbours.
I even found that people started to talk to me more often and somehow I felt they enjoyed my company more.
The Story of Commitment
In creating my life this week from my desire for
Inner peace and my intention of of feeling calm and tranquil, slow down and just be I moved past my reactivity in the following ways:
I did manage to be more in the moment, especially in the first few days after our last call. I sometimes managed to not feel guilty about not finishing everything on my to do lits
The Con Artist triggered my reactivity of getting annoyed, feeling questioned when (be specific)…
Being annoyed when I felt my manager was micro managing me
Sharing negative comments with my tean when I felt my department was being unfairly critized.
My desire for peace and tranquility,helped me recover and be more courageous when ....
My husband wasn’t reacting very enthusiastic when I found a lovely beach house to buy
When my husband did not help me make arrangement with contractors for extension of terrace
When my husband did not help out when the twins woke up at night
Breaking free of my reactivity and staying in this energy desire is important at this time because it means I am more committed to…
Being happier and more positive and not worry less. I become a person people enjoy being around with an air of positivity.
Inner peace and my intention of of feeling calm and tranquil, slow down and just be I moved past my reactivity in the following ways:
I did manage to be more in the moment, especially in the first few days after our last call. I sometimes managed to not feel guilty about not finishing everything on my to do lits
The Con Artist triggered my reactivity of getting annoyed, feeling questioned when (be specific)…
Being annoyed when I felt my manager was micro managing me
Sharing negative comments with my tean when I felt my department was being unfairly critized.
My desire for peace and tranquility,helped me recover and be more courageous when ....
My husband wasn’t reacting very enthusiastic when I found a lovely beach house to buy
When my husband did not help me make arrangement with contractors for extension of terrace
When my husband did not help out when the twins woke up at night
Breaking free of my reactivity and staying in this energy desire is important at this time because it means I am more committed to…
Being happier and more positive and not worry less. I become a person people enjoy being around with an air of positivity.
The Story of my Desire
I see that my reactivity limits me in various ways and disconnects me from the energy I most desire to live in. This week I am willing to turn up my desire for Inner Peace by focusing on…
Living in the moment, enjoying small things, feeling the sun on my skin, looking at the trees, trusting all be all right in the end
Because of my desire for Inner Peace,
I’m willing to feel more…
Accepting of all around me
Living in the moment, enjoying small things, feeling the sun on my skin, looking at the trees, trusting all be all right in the end
Because of my desire for Inner Peace,
I’m willing to feel more…
Accepting of all around me
The Story of Connection
My commitment to my personal freedom this week inspired me to grow stronger emotional roots to my authentic self when I…
Allowed myself to smile to strangers
Allowed myself to cry in front of others
Allowed myself to rest when I needed it
I saw that my stand for embracing my vulnerabilities grew my connection to my energy desire of inner peace and hapiness by grounding me in the truth of…
I am worthy the way I am
It is OK to admit my mistakes and my weaknesses and to be vulnerable
It is Ok to simple be and enjoy life
Challenges presented by life are learning opportunities and all will be allright in the end
What surprised me the most this week was seeing that I betray my energy desire when I…
Panic when I feel criticized and think others think I am not performing up to standard
The limiting belief that most holds me back from greater freedom from reactivity is…
The belief that everything should be done and should be perfect. I have tried but and part of me accepts it is Ok to make mistakes and to have flaws but my con artist is still sending me strong messages that mistakes and weaknesses are not acceptable
I am more free from my reactivity this week because…
I did allow myself to open up to others and was able in some instances to be vulnerable.
I did experience moments where I was able to accept my vulnerabilities but I am not yet at the stage where I am able to really embrace and love myself for being vulnerable.
Some comments from Michele:
Our intentional practicehas taken us on a journey through the emotional "roots" that groundour connection to our true self. What have you learned this weekabout your connection to your heart? Where do you avoid expressing yourfeelings? Where do you blame others for the way you feel?
These are places to lookfor where your reactivity may thrive. Roots to our authentic self are forgedwhen we embrace how we feel as important and learn to honor and express them in support of our energy desire.
Allowed myself to smile to strangers
Allowed myself to cry in front of others
Allowed myself to rest when I needed it
I saw that my stand for embracing my vulnerabilities grew my connection to my energy desire of inner peace and hapiness by grounding me in the truth of…
I am worthy the way I am
It is OK to admit my mistakes and my weaknesses and to be vulnerable
It is Ok to simple be and enjoy life
Challenges presented by life are learning opportunities and all will be allright in the end
What surprised me the most this week was seeing that I betray my energy desire when I…
Panic when I feel criticized and think others think I am not performing up to standard
The limiting belief that most holds me back from greater freedom from reactivity is…
The belief that everything should be done and should be perfect. I have tried but and part of me accepts it is Ok to make mistakes and to have flaws but my con artist is still sending me strong messages that mistakes and weaknesses are not acceptable
I am more free from my reactivity this week because…
I did allow myself to open up to others and was able in some instances to be vulnerable.
I did experience moments where I was able to accept my vulnerabilities but I am not yet at the stage where I am able to really embrace and love myself for being vulnerable.
Some comments from Michele:
Our intentional practicehas taken us on a journey through the emotional "roots" that groundour connection to our true self. What have you learned this weekabout your connection to your heart? Where do you avoid expressing yourfeelings? Where do you blame others for the way you feel?
These are places to lookfor where your reactivity may thrive. Roots to our authentic self are forgedwhen we embrace how we feel as important and learn to honor and express them in support of our energy desire.
The Story of Roots
The Story of Roots
I am deepening the roots that ground my commitment to transform my reactivity by taking a stand for…
Accepting myself as I am, I am worthy as I am including my weaknesses and vulnerabilities which are part of me and deserve to be embraced. I deserve to be happy!
This stand nourishes the meaning of my life by supporting me to continue to be courageous about…
Admitting my mistakes and my weaknesses, accepting life provides challenges which are opportunities to learn and to grow.
Loving myself for being vulnerable.
To really believe and accept it is Ok to make mistakes and that this is all part of a learning process.
Allowing myself to feeling good about doing something of which the sole and only purpose is to feel joy, pleasure.
Knowing that my desire for and commitment to inner peace and happiness is growing deeper in my consciousness inspires me to believe that…
I am fine just the way I am, I am worthy, my mistakes, faults and weaknesses are part of who I am.
My identity is much more and goes way beyond my professional self. It is OK to make mistakes and to be vulnerable. Life is about experiencing joy and happiness. This is what makes life worth living in the end.
My intention for my personal freedom this week is to:
To be able to admit my mistakes without feeling vulnerable and accept that making mistakes is a way of learning and allows me to grow.
Embrace my weaknesses and vulnerabilities
and allowing myself to be carefree, have fun and be playful.
The above is a revised version of my story of roots. Michee asked me to rewrite my story without any "nots" or even " without" in it.
She holds vulnerability as the capacity to be more real and not a weakness but as the key to our authenticity.
I am deepening the roots that ground my commitment to transform my reactivity by taking a stand for…
Accepting myself as I am, I am worthy as I am including my weaknesses and vulnerabilities which are part of me and deserve to be embraced. I deserve to be happy!
This stand nourishes the meaning of my life by supporting me to continue to be courageous about…
Admitting my mistakes and my weaknesses, accepting life provides challenges which are opportunities to learn and to grow.
Loving myself for being vulnerable.
To really believe and accept it is Ok to make mistakes and that this is all part of a learning process.
Allowing myself to feeling good about doing something of which the sole and only purpose is to feel joy, pleasure.
Knowing that my desire for and commitment to inner peace and happiness is growing deeper in my consciousness inspires me to believe that…
I am fine just the way I am, I am worthy, my mistakes, faults and weaknesses are part of who I am.
My identity is much more and goes way beyond my professional self. It is OK to make mistakes and to be vulnerable. Life is about experiencing joy and happiness. This is what makes life worth living in the end.
My intention for my personal freedom this week is to:
To be able to admit my mistakes without feeling vulnerable and accept that making mistakes is a way of learning and allows me to grow.
Embrace my weaknesses and vulnerabilities
and allowing myself to be carefree, have fun and be playful.
The above is a revised version of my story of roots. Michee asked me to rewrite my story without any "nots" or even " without" in it.
She holds vulnerability as the capacity to be more real and not a weakness but as the key to our authenticity.
The story of my Reactivity
The Story of My Reactivity
I feel most dissatisfied and reactive in my life right now because of the following circumstances:
I do not feel fulfilled in any of the areas important in my life. I feel stuck in my job, between work and children there is no time left for a social life, I feel I have only 1 friend who I hardly see because of lack of time. I am just going through the motions day by day. The only happiness in my life are my three daughters (6 year old and 1 year and 3 month old twins). But I do feel that because I do not feel in balance and fulfilled I cannot be the best mom. I have serious doubts about marriage, I am disappointed and I do not feel connection.
The biggest symptom of my reactivity is…
Even though I know I have some structural issues in my life and my priorities are all wrong I do not know how break the cycle of negativity. I just go through the motions and focus on the daily priorities at work.
This symptom leaves me feeling…
Miserable because I know I am not making the right choices but I do not know how to make a change
I find myself powerless over my thoughts because…
The worries about the issues I am not addressing keep coming up and I do not think they will go away if issues are not addressed. There are just too many things, it’s overwhelming.
When I’m triggered by my reactivity I find myself indulging in the following behaviors:
Unhealthy eating habits and excessive television watching to numb myself
The critical voice, or the Con Artist, says that my reactivity and dissatisfaction are real because…
These are all real problems and I have little power or control to change these
What is true about your reactivity?
That I have some real issues going on in my life
What is false about your reactivity?
The fact that I have no control over them. I should be able to address them step by step but I do not know where to start.
What is your reactivity keeping your from experiencing most at this time?
Happiness and inner peace
The reactivity that I would most like to transform in this class is:
My passivity in not confronting problems
TAPPING THE CREATIVE POWER OF
YOUR WHOLE IQ
Please write the first thing that comes to mind for each answer in the order they are written.
1-What is the energy you most desire to live in?
An atmosphere of peace, tranquility and warmth
2-What moves you to make a commitment and take action?
My pride, I think I am trying very hard to portray this perfect image of myself to the outside world and it is killing me inside
3-What experiences deepen the meaning of your life?
Feeling the love of my children, a good conversation with a dear friend, enjoying the sea breeze and the sun on my skin
4-What experiences liberate your connection to your passion or authentic self?
The rare occasions when I am able to spend time with a group of friends. Pilates classes when I manage to relax and feel my body getting stronger and balanced.
5-What truth brings you the greatest clarity at this time?
I need to make a change..
6-What are you gifted at creating?
Very complex spreadsheets…
7-What visible forms (forms= results, possessions, body, places, structures, and relationships) do you recognize as valuable?
Relationships with friends, in the past the sense of solidarity and being a team with my husband, being respected as a professional, having a welcoming house where people like to spend time
8-What impact do you want to make in your life/world?
I want people to remember me as someone who made them feel better about themselves.
9-Looking over your answers, circle the areas most affected by your reactivity.
Area most affected are relationships and taking care of myself.
And here's Michele's reaction:
Yes, yes, nourishing Inner Peace is the seed of your energy desire! Also, I see that you are opening yourself up to faith. Faith can not occur in a state of perfectionism or feeling that you need to take on or confront your circumstances. We can not receive support from the Universal Intelligence, as I call it, or God when we are in
reactivity.
As you soften into Inner Peace, you will observe your challenges with more inner and outer resources and notice things you don't see when you are braced.
You will also see more clearly what you want to accept and what may no longer serve you froma place of revelation or fixing something.
I'm SO glad that you are in the class. I can feel your beautiful energy even when you were attempting to unwind. Your Spirit is grace. Savor this week of exploring your gorgeous energy. Imagine being pregnant with your true self!
I am so surprised in apositive way by the very personalized approach of these classes and Michele's one to one support. I feel like I am heading somewhere with this and I am excited about the journey!!!
Facing my Con Artist.....
Facing the Con Artist: Transforming Your Reactivity into Sustainability
Reactivity wastes our time and is different from having a truthful emotion because it has a negative story attached to it. In the four weeks teleclass the idea is to face how your patterns of reactivity such as fear, worry, overwhelm, procrastination, avoidance, doubt, lack of intimacy hold you back, or how having to be overly pleasing, caring, busy, self-reliant, and saving others has served you.
All reactive patterns keep you in a story of controlling your reality and masking your true self. Rather than creating your life from a connection to your self and others, your energy is used to either overcome the circumstances you’re afraid of, avoiding what you don’t want to deal with, or trying to keep it all together and look good. In this class, Michele will support you to create a new story that helps you move past the Con Artist and the circumstances that trigger your reactivity and create a new story that sustains your true self.
I was a bit secptocal at first but also intrigued so was looking forward to the first call.
Reactivity wastes our time and is different from having a truthful emotion because it has a negative story attached to it. In the four weeks teleclass the idea is to face how your patterns of reactivity such as fear, worry, overwhelm, procrastination, avoidance, doubt, lack of intimacy hold you back, or how having to be overly pleasing, caring, busy, self-reliant, and saving others has served you.
All reactive patterns keep you in a story of controlling your reality and masking your true self. Rather than creating your life from a connection to your self and others, your energy is used to either overcome the circumstances you’re afraid of, avoiding what you don’t want to deal with, or trying to keep it all together and look good. In this class, Michele will support you to create a new story that helps you move past the Con Artist and the circumstances that trigger your reactivity and create a new story that sustains your true self.
I was a bit secptocal at first but also intrigued so was looking forward to the first call.
Soul's dream and whole IQ
So after I was intrigued by the list of questions from my previous post I checked out the following website
http://wholeiq.com
The Soul’s Dream is about developing greater harmony, divine connection, and balance in your life. It occurs as a result of transforming a belief, pattern, or role that perpetuates an experience of being stuck, reactive, in avoidance, or lost in a life transition. Your Soul’s Dream is not a destination or a measured achievement. It’s more about creating a new story in your life that reflects the strength of your creative consciousness and ability to follow through on fulfilling your deepest desires.
What’s Your Whole IQ?
Your Whole IQ is the sum of our Spirit, Heart, Mind, and Body intelligences. Your Spirit intelligence governs your energy, your Heart intelligence governs your feelings, your Mind intelligences governs your thoughts, and your Body intelligence governs all tangible forms in your reality. Tangible forms include your physical body, health, job, all environments—including geography, home, work, car and travels, your intimate relationships, family, and friendships, recreational activities, your finances, and how you organize your time and space. When you feel a sense of connection and alignment to the forms of your life, you are living from your Whole IQ and experiencing the integration of your Spirit/energy, Heart/feeling, and Mind/thought in Body intelligence.
Why is it important to awaken your Whole IQ?
Having a conscious relationship with your Whole IQ allows you to be more present, authentic, and productive in your life. When you are feeling disconnection or discontentment with the forms of your life, the place to look is where are you out of touch with your Spirit, Heart, and Mind? We often look to form to solve our problems and give us gratification when we are disenfranchised from our inner world. Awakening your Whole IQ is analogous to driving a car with four tires on it and gas in the tank. Many of us are hoping to get somewhere in our lives and struggling to figure out what the problem is or find a quick fix. The problem is they are driving their lives from primarily two intelligences, Mind/thoughts into Body/forms and neglecting or misusing their Spirit/energy and Heart/ feelings. The result is an inner world low on inspiration, passion, depth, and connectedness.
Mind over matter mentality is not going to work in our modern world. When you negate, compartmentalize, or misuse your intelligences, you separate yourself from the full power of your fulfillment and impact. If you find yourself tolerating or avoiding certain circumstances, pushing through others, and feeling inauthentic, stuck, resentful, or apathetic, you are in mind over matter mentality. Basically you are working harder to stay busy and overcome some powerful truth that is the key to your liberation. When you are not awake to your Whole IQ, you are more susceptible to the negative beliefs or judgments inflicted by the Con Artist, the voice that robs you of realizing your full potential again and again. In the mind over matter mentality, you are most often giving your allegiance to a good idea that you has been learned or read about and yet doesn't connect you to your soul.
All the above made sense to me so I subscribed to a teleclass o find out more.
http://wholeiq.com
The Soul’s Dream is about developing greater harmony, divine connection, and balance in your life. It occurs as a result of transforming a belief, pattern, or role that perpetuates an experience of being stuck, reactive, in avoidance, or lost in a life transition. Your Soul’s Dream is not a destination or a measured achievement. It’s more about creating a new story in your life that reflects the strength of your creative consciousness and ability to follow through on fulfilling your deepest desires.
What’s Your Whole IQ?
Your Whole IQ is the sum of our Spirit, Heart, Mind, and Body intelligences. Your Spirit intelligence governs your energy, your Heart intelligence governs your feelings, your Mind intelligences governs your thoughts, and your Body intelligence governs all tangible forms in your reality. Tangible forms include your physical body, health, job, all environments—including geography, home, work, car and travels, your intimate relationships, family, and friendships, recreational activities, your finances, and how you organize your time and space. When you feel a sense of connection and alignment to the forms of your life, you are living from your Whole IQ and experiencing the integration of your Spirit/energy, Heart/feeling, and Mind/thought in Body intelligence.
Why is it important to awaken your Whole IQ?
Having a conscious relationship with your Whole IQ allows you to be more present, authentic, and productive in your life. When you are feeling disconnection or discontentment with the forms of your life, the place to look is where are you out of touch with your Spirit, Heart, and Mind? We often look to form to solve our problems and give us gratification when we are disenfranchised from our inner world. Awakening your Whole IQ is analogous to driving a car with four tires on it and gas in the tank. Many of us are hoping to get somewhere in our lives and struggling to figure out what the problem is or find a quick fix. The problem is they are driving their lives from primarily two intelligences, Mind/thoughts into Body/forms and neglecting or misusing their Spirit/energy and Heart/ feelings. The result is an inner world low on inspiration, passion, depth, and connectedness.
Mind over matter mentality is not going to work in our modern world. When you negate, compartmentalize, or misuse your intelligences, you separate yourself from the full power of your fulfillment and impact. If you find yourself tolerating or avoiding certain circumstances, pushing through others, and feeling inauthentic, stuck, resentful, or apathetic, you are in mind over matter mentality. Basically you are working harder to stay busy and overcome some powerful truth that is the key to your liberation. When you are not awake to your Whole IQ, you are more susceptible to the negative beliefs or judgments inflicted by the Con Artist, the voice that robs you of realizing your full potential again and again. In the mind over matter mentality, you are most often giving your allegiance to a good idea that you has been learned or read about and yet doesn't connect you to your soul.
All the above made sense to me so I subscribed to a teleclass o find out more.
Why I started this blog
I came across the following list of questions which made me think hard and deep:
1-Do you consistently struggle with self-doubt, judgments, worry, or other symptoms that hold you back from experiencing greater peace?
2-Do you have a sense that there is more to life, more inside of you that you'd like to realize, and don't know how to get to it?
3-Are you chronically taking care of, pleasing others, or hiding out in some way that compromises your authenticity?
4-Do you tend to avoid dealing with things, feel unmotivated, procrastinate, or are waiting for circumstances to change in order to feel better?
5-Are you reactive, resistant, or controlling in relationships on a regular basis?
If you answered YES to any one of these questions, your Con Artist is alive and well and the final question is:
Are ready to face it and begin taking ownership of your true desires?
In my case I the answer way yes to all the about questions so I got curious and went to the website.
1-Do you consistently struggle with self-doubt, judgments, worry, or other symptoms that hold you back from experiencing greater peace?
2-Do you have a sense that there is more to life, more inside of you that you'd like to realize, and don't know how to get to it?
3-Are you chronically taking care of, pleasing others, or hiding out in some way that compromises your authenticity?
4-Do you tend to avoid dealing with things, feel unmotivated, procrastinate, or are waiting for circumstances to change in order to feel better?
5-Are you reactive, resistant, or controlling in relationships on a regular basis?
If you answered YES to any one of these questions, your Con Artist is alive and well and the final question is:
Are ready to face it and begin taking ownership of your true desires?
In my case I the answer way yes to all the about questions so I got curious and went to the website.
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